Monday, July 05, 2004

Best. Sentence. Ever.

"We have a policy we're not being hacked."

Thursday, July 01, 2004

Man

The Blogger editorials just keep getting better and better.

Saturday, June 26, 2004

Self-Help

Lorrie Moore is a goddess.

"First, try to be something, anything, else. A movie star/astronaut. A movie star/missionary. A movie star/kindergarten teacher. President of the World. Fail miserably. It is best if you fail at an early age--say, fourteen. Early, critical disillusionment is necessary so that at fifteen you can write long haiku sequences about thwarted desire. It is a pond, a cherry blossom, a wind brushing against sparrow wing leaving for mountain. Count the syllables. Show it to your mom. She is tough and practical. She has a son in Vietnam and a husband who may be having an affair. She believes in wearing brown because it hides spots. She'll look briefly at your writing, then back up at you with a face blank as a doughnut. She'll say: 'How about emptying the dishwasher?' Look away. Shove the forks in the fork drawer. Acccidentally break one of the freebie gas station glasses. This is the required pain and suffering. This is only for starters."

I'll Have My Coffee Black, Hey Look We're Bombing Iraq..

You know what sucks? Nellie McKay's the newest big thing, but everyone's so frigging obsessed with Britney Whatsherface and Kevin Who-Knows and other celebrities undeserving of our time.

Pop culture's going gone down the drain.

Thursday, June 24, 2004

Cut

I wish Blogger had like, a Cut option to posts. It'd be nice, like if I was posting a huge entry, I could have it so it just shows part of my post and then a "continue" link to the individual archive page where the whole post shows. Just an idea.

Wednesday, June 23, 2004

Thanks, FX

You know what really bugged me today? I was watching Say Anything, and right in the middle of the classic jukebox scene, it cuts to a commercial about freaking American Chopper. Really spoiled it for me.

Sunday, June 20, 2004

The Nothing Post

I don't really know what I'm blogging about right now. I don't have any bad stories to make fun of.. nothing really. Right now I'm at that stage where everything's in hyperdrive and moves so fast I don't have time to chronicle everything and besides, if I did, nothing seems to be happening around here.

One of my wishes is this blog could actually stand for something. I know it's because I'm an eleven year old and my thoughts aren't complex enough (actually yes, they are, but putting them online is like trying to recreate Mount Rushmore with toothpicks and clay. Something like that.) to be meaningful. This post is straight nothningness, so whoever actually reads this, I apologize.

Saturday, June 19, 2004

Heaven

There is a Gmail LiveJournal community. Oh my.